“…when a person does judge himself, then the judgment passed on high is annulled and he need not fear of be afraid of anything, since his judgment isn’t “clothed” in anything else.
“For he has already nullified the judgments on himself by judging himself on his own…
“In this way, a person elevates fear to its source so that he will fear only God and nothing else…”
—Rebbe Nachman of Breslov, Likutey Moharan, Lesson 15
One of the essential parts of hisbodedus, prayerful meditation in which an individual speaks to Hashem in her own voice, is learning to reflect on and evaluate our personal actions, words, and thoughts.
In order to evaluate ourselves with any sense of objectivity (and not be overly negative or unrealistic), it is important to have some knowledge of what our potential is and what we are capable of. To do that, we learn Torah, familiarize ourselves with the mitzvos (commandments incumbent on a Jew), and make an effort to align our actions with moral behavior as defined by Torah.
Does this sound like a daunting prospect? There is a way to make it much easier.
Ask God for help.
Use at least part of your hisbodedus session to ask Hashem, in your own words, to help you come closer to Him and learn his Torah.
You can ask Hashem to help you with hisbodedus itself. You can ask Hashem to give you insight into what you need to correct. You can ask Hashem to help you find the direction in which you need to go.
You can even ask to be strengthened in emunah, faith, the constant awareness that God is always there, and that everything happens ultimately for the best.
Then when you begin to assess your thoughts, words, and actions, you come from a position of strength in humility.
This article sponsored by Efrat bat Malka.
I often tell Hashem that I don’t even know what kind of help to ask Him for, that He should just give me help! Abba, na.